lunes, 23 de julio de 2007
Why does it always rain on me?
I've always been thinking that the circunstances make you do stupid things or taking bad desitions....bbut well, is better to take a desition than not taking it and then regret for that.
Hiding......
Dr. Cox, can deal with almost everything, he can stand with a thousands of problems, including peoples personalities, and being chief in the hospital also.
Sometimes, we hide our personality with something that , for us, it is easier to show.....anyway.
I really admire Dr. Cox
www.scrubs-tv.com
If ......reloaded
En vestimenta:
- los tenis de steve zissou
- los trajes de los chicos de interpol
En cuerpo:
- El abdomen de Micke Rourke
- Los brazos de Trent Reznor
- El peinado de Robert Smith
En habilidades:
- La hablidad con la bateria de Neil peart (rush)
- La habilidad en los dedos de Joe Satriani, Jimmy hendrix, Steve Vai, Ynwwie Malmstein.
- La sensibilidad de Joan Miró y jackson pollock
En Inteligencia:
- El cerebro de Albert Einstein y Frederich Nietczhe
En personalidad
- DAVID BOWIE
MOTHERFUCKER
domingo, 22 de julio de 2007
ABISMO......
Las gotas caen una por una, mientras se confunden con el sudor de la piel, me detengo, y observo a mi alrededor...que estoy buscando?, pienso.....y camino, tan lentamente con la esperanza agarrada en una mano y la realidad en la otra.......la gota que recorre mi cuello de pronto se hace mas clara, dentro de la nubosidad de la noche que me envuelve, porque no siento?, me pregunto.
Las gotas ya no caen, detengo el tiempo un poco mas, miro hacia abajo, el angel caido que reposa en la acera, fria, humeda y deslizante, me extiende su mano, yo......llo contemplo, sin palabras, atonito, fuera de mi........ser......que no existe, que quiere, que pretende, que sueña, todavia, aun, con la eternidad, con la inmortalidad........y mi alma que no existe, que se va.
Abro los ojos......la oscuridad todavia me abriga, lo negro de mis ojos se nubla, mis labios secos, mis manos rotas y mi corazon....................desgarrado, perdido, olvidado, soñado.
La sonrisa que se borro.......mis pies cansados.......mi cuerpo que no fue, es o sera.........y si tan solo esta noche pudiera dormir?....cuando fui mordido?.......la caja negra que cargaba se hace mas pesada......la cama de rosas donde dormia ahora esta perdida y yo.......yo soy, existo, aunque no siempre sea asi, aunque no siempre lo desee.
Que tanto he caminado, con la soledad a un lado, con mis sueños tirados y arrastrando mi existir, tropezando con los recuerdos de alguien mas tirados en las banquetas.........no veo nada....sueño e imagino......y me detengo....de nuevo.
Miro hacia el cielo......mi esperanza esta en el suelo al igual que mi realidad, las gotas regresan, a su lugar, a donde pertenecen y yo por igual......la sangre......mi sangre llena la copa......eternidad.....no necesito pensar, no necesito recordar, tampoco imaginar.......no necesito sentir.......despierto.......y aun siento.......los sueños, la puta e insoportable levedad del ser........no necesito sentir.....no necesito ser.
My top ten of coolest guys
- Bill Murray
- David Bowie
- Steve Bushemi
- Jhon Cameroon Michell
- Wes Anderson
- Joan Miró
- Jackson Pollock
- Christopher Walken
- Forrest Withaker
- Trent Reznor
sábado, 21 de julio de 2007
Eyes wide open
Lo recuerdo......claramente......como si no hubiera pasado tanto tiempo......como si el tiempo se hubiera detenido.
Yo, caminaba, siempre con la cabeza abajo, escuchando en mi mente alguna cancion de the cure para no entrometerme en lo que no tenia sentido, con las manos sudadas.....con el cabello largo tapando mi cara.....con aquel pantalon viejo y despintado....con mis tenis rotos y mi camiseta de alguna banda de rock.
Encendia mi primer cigarrillo del dia sentado en las blancas escaleras de la inconsiencia, temeroso...extaciado....melancolico...como siempre.
La vista se nublaba, el sonido desaparecia y las manos que intentaban tocarme se desvanecian en un intento estupido de agarrarle y no soltarle.........lo negro de los ojos que me veian y sonreian.....con las ganas de tomarme para no soltarme y amarme.......la falda larga, el sueter de color absurdo, los labios partidos a la mitad y el cabello como velo que no dejaba entrar luz alguna.
El tiempo que gota a gota pasaba y consumia......y la desvanecencia del ser, que.....me recordaba que en un sueño......lo unico que deseas es tocar, acariciar, besar, tener y sostener.
cuando te despiertas............ya nada es igual.
chose a life......
It doesn´t matter if you are a junkie, it doesn´t matter if you are a porn addict or, even in the lesser cases you can be addict to cleanning, you can be addict to man or woman as well, there are some many fucking addictions that you can´t even count them, the truth is my dear friends, that all of us are addicts to something, and, who said that the addictions aren't good for us..............
WE ALL ARE ADDICTS TO HURT OURSELVES.....in some way, but, why we do this?.....that's a very easy answer.....we hurt ourselves because we just want to feel pain, to see if we are alive, to see if we can breathe again, to realize that we are not dead yet, because that´s our nature.
So, when I was in the bus on the way home, I realize that even when we don´t want hurt to anyone, we did or do, even because of our past, that is not so bad anyway, because when you fell hurt even if it is painful, you also realize that you are alive, that you soul still there and your heart still felling something.
So, I chose a life......and nobody can blame me for that.......even if my life is not the best enough....
miércoles, 18 de julio de 2007
Fly me to the moon.......
As an experience.......I should say that, not always fliyng is a very good experience, I´ve knew people who was afraid of flying or had a bad experience on the plains, but, I can sure you, that the probabilities that you die in a plane crash are really shorts.
The people really do not understand that everytime that you buy a plane ticket, you buy also a lot of rules that you have to follow, this is a complete issue, becuse of the mot of the cases we can´t do anything to help people.
I´m talking about this, just becuse, i used to work in an airplane company, and everytime we had problems, the people gone crazy, sometimes we, as a clients, should understand that there are things that are not in our hands, like weather or maintance problems, as an employee i can say that the answer for the passengers is always the same: "it is more important your safety, that a few minutes on time", but the just simply don´t understand.
There are a lot of reasons why a plane gets delayed, from a maintance incident to air traffic and in the lesser cases a delay because of the weather.
Anyway, the next time you will take a plane:
- If you buy a ticket, please read the small letters and the part that said "IMPORTANT".
- Pay atention to the travel agent.
- when you arrived to the airport pay atention to the indicators.
- when you go to make check-in, pay attention to the airline employe
- when you are at the stairway of the plane, please shut down your cell phone
And remember this: A plane flights over 10.000 feets, if your plane goes down, don't worry you´ll be death by the time the plane crash on earth, and that´s because you surely have a heart-attack, because your heart longs at least betwen 15 or 20 seconds to stop.
So, don´t be afraid, even, you will be closer from good, and He surely listen your prayers.......nearly.
martes, 17 de julio de 2007
I´m sorry.....
As I told you the other night, is that I felt a little jelous, i know that for you is not esay either, I only want you to know that I love you, so very much.........
Time.....
I started to cry already, but it doesn´t matter, because nobody can see me, because the tears confused with the rain.
I´m still walking in a desert street, hoping, while the darkness of the night hold me..........It was just a dream? or I lived it....................
My watch suddenly stops, is better like this I thought, however the time does not exist.........
domingo, 15 de julio de 2007
Oshhhh......
I don't know if you are afraid because i know you more than you can imagine, the fact that you cannot hide you mood or any of you feelings with me.
I'm not going to hurt you, but there is something that really makes me angry, when you refuse to talk when I know that something is wrong, you did not say anything at all, and I just have to wait if you want to talk to me.
I´m so fucking sick of it all, I hope you understand me, I really think you don't trust in me, and I don't know why, maybe is because you think I don´t trust in you.
So i don´t have anything to do, just sitting here smoking a cigarrette and waiting you tell me something.
While the time goes by, while the night pass by.
sábado, 14 de julio de 2007
MIAU.......
G and I had an argument the other day, we were fighting for a few minutes, we were angry each other, and obvious, the enviroment got intense as we were.
Suddenly, Lilly, g's pet come to me, she walked around me very slowly, put her head in my hand with the intention to get some care, I did, then she went with g and did the same ritual, she got lay on the bed, between us, watch me......watch g and got ly her head in her hand, so, I got lay in the bed at the side of g to gave lilly a caress and sudddenly she stands up and go away, she waited for a few minutes at the bottom of the bed, watch us again and got away very slowly.........
G and I started to laugh, so we sarted to talk again and solve the problem, later that night, we talk about lilly's behaviour, we realize that all that lilly did was for us, when she stands at the bottom of the bed was like if she told us : "c' mon is your turn guys I did my part already".
Lilly is not a cat, is not a woman, lilly is from the outerspace I'm sure about that.
Thanks lilly.
viernes, 13 de julio de 2007
WORDS.........
And I got sleep too.............
If I hurt you in some ways, I'm sorry, i never meant to, really, I love you too, so very much, and like i've always said, I know that you've always be mine...............Forgive me.
jueves, 12 de julio de 2007
I'm totally fu***d..........
- Nayeli: Your lips will never forget me, i'm sure.
- Thabatha: Nice face, no brain.
- Christian: I'm still keeping your secret.
- Alejandra: Thanks, I'm stronger now.
- Monica: Ixtapan remember us.
- Flor: I remember you.
- Loana: I'm still looking for.
- Pamela: I don't remember you last name jajajaja.
- Adriana: I enjoy it a lot.
- Michelle: My french is still bad, jaja, thanks fo the lessons.
- Laura: I'm sorry for that.
- Araceli: I really did not enjoy it too much, but thanks anyway.
- Rita: I remember your hair, you remember the wind.
- Adriana: They never know.
- Miriam: I remember your piercing.
- The UDLA girl: I enjoyed that party a lot.
- Fernanda: It was tender.
- Stephany: jajajajaja, He doesn't know either.
- Pamela: Your brother surely never imagine.
- Heather: Can-cun was pretty hot.
- Ariadna: Nice fucking car heee.
- Canadian Girl: uffffffffff
- Asian girl: What a pretty eyes.
- Delaware Girl: They told me...........
- All Amarican girls: We have nice fun.
- Rocio: Thanks babe.
- Paola: I've always enjoy go to see you........and your sister too¡¡¡.
- Paola's sister: mmmmmm as i said.
- Pamela: It was just that you mention before.
- Chemistry Teacher: Thanks for that 10.
- Abuela: Not bad haaaa.
- Montserrat: yay.
- Marisol: alex say hi.........jajajaja.
- Marisol: I remember that day, you looked so pretty with (out) that dress.
- Aracely: mmmmmm how could we explain that......
- Kenya: I learn to fly.
- Ana: too much babe, thanks.
- Charlotte: (Sometimes)
- Ana Paula: Ok, what a good ass, i should admit it.
- Grande: You are such dirty.
- Grande's sister: as equals as her sister.
- Marcela: Nice heeee, finally your trick works.
- Rocio: ok, that was good.
- Rebeca: uyyyy almost, you know.
- Paulina: your soft hands.
- Karla: just 5 days....
- Karen:excellent trick babe.
- Chihuahua's Girl: 10, 000 feet club, thanks.
- Michellet: You said i was a gentleman, i was thinking in ........ your big eyes.
Thanks
miércoles, 11 de julio de 2007
Dealing....
I started to reading one night, I get involved in it while i was passing the pages, In the story he tell about all his girlfriends and his sexual and love experiences, the last sentence that he put in that book was "When you find a very true love, your demonds have been always follow you, as a shadows in the dark, but you don't have to be worried about your demonds, you have to be worried about hers".
I did not understand a lot this sentence in that time, until I assocciate all the book to the last sentence.
Sometimes is hard to being in love, and i really don't know how or what makes that love hurts, in fact, I don't know if the love is true, you said that word always, to everyone, and, that makes you feel better?, no way.................the things that you share with somebody else makes you feel in love, but sometimes i feel that It does not matter, you jump from one girl to other pretending being in love or looking for it, I thing that love is like time..............relative...........It is funny... because you said that you love somebody but you are thinking in somebody else........you said that you are looking the true love and have sex with everyone when the circunstances are allowed to do it.......you said that you are happy but in fact is an utopic happiness.
And all that shit makes me think now, that it is so hard to find the love just because our remembers makes us feel in earth and not in air.......it is always about wishes......and in some point you wish impossible things......love is not a feeling, nobody is looking for love instead of that all of us are looking somebody to share with..............
So, like I've always said "If I exorcise my demonds then my angels leave me too, when they leave, they're so hard to find"
Thanks Tom Waits for such a truly sentence.
And thanks garcia Marquez for such a great book
HURT..........
Camine a la salida mientras encendia un cigarrillo, las luces blancas iluminaban mi cara, yo, buscaba, hasta la salida, baje la cabeza y pense:
"Gracias Rock por estos momentos, ojala me hubieras dado una cosa mas, para la proxima.......seguro........para la proxima"
martes, 10 de julio de 2007
IUOUCH????
I'm pretty happy because she lets me share all this with her, sharing the same space, she's so sweet with me, she makes me feel so comfortably, she moved into her house on saturday, his brother and I help her to do it, we carried on the stuffs and boxes, at the end of the day we were a little bit tired but it does not matter because we were together, she looks pretty happy with her house and I can notice that because she always give me that beautiful smile, she has a lot of plans in her new house and that makes her feel better now, I´m not worried about her because she is a great girl and very smart woman...........she is worried about me, jajajajaja, I just love when she got a little bit jelous when other girls looks at me, I've always botering with that, the first time we go to the house she got jelous because of the neighbor upstairs, that girl saw me and g's brother standing there and she blows her eyes and tell us goodbye, not to mention the market´s girl too, I always said that I'm so charming and she got angry in a good way, I just love her too much, she always said to me that I'm so tall and so handsome and I know that is not true, she tells that becuse she loves me and that makes feel good as always do.
We talk about us, we talk about our past together and I think now we are learning a lot of things or I should say discoveryng things that we thougth not were there.
Ok.....now I have to say that I love you very much g, you make me feel special like nobody ever did or do, I love your body, your smile, the words in your mouth, the way you kiss me, the way you touch me, making you love is such a great experience, when you are sweet and tender and when you are dirty and kinky too, thanks for everything and as I always said in order to being so selfish.....
G, you were always mine.
P.S. I'm nervious because I'm going to meet her mother today...........iouch
viernes, 6 de julio de 2007
If I exorscise my demonds then my angels leave me too, when they leave they're so hard to find.
miércoles, 4 de julio de 2007
50 CENTAVOS
La gente afuera chiflaba impaciente, mientras tanto nosotros fumabamos como chacuacos, el Ezquizo emocionado me contaba la historia de tan decadente artista, yo, no le ponia mucha atencion, sin embargo su platica me entretenia, algo escuche sobre que el habia estado en la carcel acusado de asesinar a alguien, eso si me impacto un poco, sin embargo ya sabemos todos, que el medio de la farandula esta hecho de especulaciones.
Las puertas se abrieron, todo tipo de chicos entraban por esa puerta, con pantalones bombachos, gorras de beisbolista, camisetas xxl, tenis blancos y joyeria exagerada, grandes cadenas que colgaban de sus cuellos y relojes que verdaderamente exageraban en pidreria chafa comprada en el centro de la ciudad.
La camioneta Escalade arribo por la puerta trasera, se bajaron antes que el, miles de raperos, negros gordos con la misma vestimenta antes descrita, la unica diferencia es que, la joyeria y los relojes tambien estaban compradas en el centro, no de la ciudad de Mexico sino de Nueva York, en Tifany's para ser exactos.
Despues salio el, pantalon de mezclilla, camiseta negra sin mangas, gorra negra de los Yankees de Nueva York y un Red Bull en la mano, saluudo a todos muy desentemente, una sonrisa muy timida se escondia en su boca mientras a su paso los altos directivos le daban la bienvenida.
No tardo mucho en salir al escenario, la gente gritaba, las primeras canciones prendieron en demacia, sin embargo, despues de la cuarta o quinta, se torno en exceso aburrido, el Exquizo me veia con unos ojos de : "No mames, que bizarro", yo, como siempre, asentia como diciendole: "A uevo te lo dije k".
Al terminar el concierto y salir por la puerta rumbo a casa, el Ezquizo se acerco y me dijo: "No manches wey, que decepcion, pense que este wey la rifaba mas", yo le dije: "Te lo dije wey a veces la musica no es tan buena, pobres los que pagaron tanto varo para ver a este wey, yo, no pagaria tanto billete".
"Ni cincuenta centavos" dijo el y sonrio.........
lunes, 2 de julio de 2007
JUST THINKING
I have to mention that Nietzche is one of my favorite writters. A few days ago I went to the church for first time in long time again, when I arrived the priest was telling to the crowd omething about charity, you know, something like the peple have to see for other people and help them, because, if you do that, God is going to get back to you double of that you give.
He starts with the ceremony, when the ceremony ends he ask us to give a "help" to the church, you know, "a few coins that you don't need in his own words", everyone starts to give their money in the basket that the priest himself passed one by one in our sits..
While he was picking up the money, he was telling us a story of that all this money helps to the maintance of the church and to give other's people food, guys who ask to feed them, and poor kids.
When all ends, we went out of the church, the priest say good bye and enter to his office, we were outside right in the front of the church saying hello to all the family cause it was a bautism, and suddenly I saw the priest walking out from the back door carrying his car keys in the left hand, he mentioned before that he had to go to a wedding party.
He opened the door of that blue car, got inside and left the place.
hooooooo I have to mention also that the car was a 2005 blue BMW with such a pretty tires and that was the moment when i turn my head to watch the church and realized that was no maintance in it, the church was exactly the same as few years ago.
My mother ask me: ¿What's up?
I answered:Nothing mom, I'm just thinking that Nietzche was right, as ususal............